The Second Chance
by ThornfieldHall
Summary: Ever since turning immortal, Alice had experienced visions of Jasper. But visions were only possibilities. Days before she was set to meet him in '48, he committed suicide. Traveling to the Cullens on her own, she accepted that she'd be alone forever. But in 1995 she suddenly gets a vision of a man who looks like Jasper. How? Rating pulled up to M from chapter 8 just to be safe.
1. 1948

**Second Chances**

Ever since turning immortal, Alice had experienced visions of Jasper. But visions were only possibilities. Days before she was set to meet him in '48, he committed suicide. Travelling to the Cullens on her own, she accepted that she'd be alone forever. But in 1995 she suddenly gets a vision of a man who looks like Jasper. How?

* * *

_ 1948_

The moment was approaching. She just knew it. She'd found the diner from her visions a couple of weeks ago, and had been visiting it every day since. The song that played in her vision had started appearing on the radio more frequently. The dress style everyone wore was alright. The only thing which needed fixing was the newspaper which didn't yet have the headlines she remembered.

If only she had seen the date on the newspaper in her vision, her razor sharp vision and immaculate memory made her visions clear and gave her the possibility of analysing all aspects of her visions, but if it wasn't featured in them, she couldn't know.

The clock ticked past the moment he was supposed to enter again. Another day, another no show.  
Just as she left the diner her vision suddenly clouded. A pressing sensation against her temples told her a vision was imminent. She quickly raced towards an empty alley when it hit her in full strength.

.

.

.

Red eyes.

Bloody lips.

Red drops running down across a chin.

Agony.

A body on the ground, a pink dress covered in blood.

A young girl.

Fear gripped Alice at the throat. She'd seen him before after a feeding. She knew the agony he experienced. It was only a matter of when he would finally crack, he'd been in a state of breaking for a long time now. He needed her.

He needed the Cullens.

He needed to stop being alone.

'Soon Jasper, soon. There's a solution to this', she whispered under her breath.

For the first time ever she got a vision immediately afterwards. It was dark. He was in an alley, across of another vampire. They were to enter a fight.

He usually won quite easily. She'd seen him fight in the 19th century. Surely, whoever ended up across of him would end up dead within a second?

The other vampire jumped. But Jasper didn't move.

.

.

.

'No.'

The vision faded to black. Her heart thrummed in an odd way.

Something was terribly off.

She found herself in the alley again.

'Please just let it be a bad vision, please.'

Throughout the rest of the day she kept telling herself other visions hadn't come true either.

But it was of no use.

At 2.30 AM she felt a sensation aching to her heart dying. It was unlike anything she had ever felt before. Worse even than the feeling of her heart battling the venom and stopping.

When the pain stopped. Her heart suddenly felt off, as if only half of a whole still existed, as if a bond she hadn't even been aware of before, had snapped.

It was in that moment she knew she had lost her soulmate without even knowing him.

Marrying him in a teacup dress, driving to the Cullens in a Cadillac, supporting him through a slip of control, having him woo her with his old fashioned ways… Gone.

She'd never before felt the urge to cry in all of her immortal existence.

The discovery she couldn't shed a single tear for her lost future drove her to even more despair.

What was she to do?

'Goddammit Jasper, we were supposed to go to them together. You stole my future as well.'


	2. 1987

_January 1987_

_._

_._

_._

A girl, clad in an ugly green t-shirt and grey long sleeved shirt underneath, sat next to Edward in class. They were looking at each other. Her attraction to him was instantaneous, just like his to her.

She looked young. Just about sixteen. But then again, Edward was but seventeen himself.

.

.

.

She blinked and the image was gone.

She'd been getting visions of Edward and the girl for years now. But this was the first time it had ever been clear. Why did she get a sharp image of them now? She replayed everything from the vision in her head. Ever since losing Jasper, she'd become very critical in analysing her visions. She'd learned that the clearer they were, the more likely they were to happen.

Edward had never gone a month without asking if she'd seen something of his future ever since she'd arrived at the doorstep of the Cullens.

The clothes weren't matching up with the current style, neither was the makeup of the other girls in the classroom. Two students had been messing around with small black objects the size of their palms, seemingly typing on them. A new invention?

There was no calendar in the vision. But if she had to judge, the vision wasn't about to come true for another couple of years. There was not a single trace of 80's fashion remaining in her vision. She knew fashion well enough such a change wasn't reached in a period under five years.

A rush behind her back informed her of Edward's presence in her room.

'Have you been snooping through my mind again?'

'You know I try to ignore everyone's thoughts. But even while fazing everyone out, my mind instantly focuses when I appear in someone's thoughts. It's like when you're wearing headphones but an alarm bell rings somewhere. The headphone phases out most sounds, but this thought was so loud it demanded my attention.'

'I understand.'

'There's a girl.'

'There is', Alice confirmed.

'When?'

'I don't know. It's not anytime soon.'

'You've told me you've seen my future before. Is it the same girl?'

Alice nodded.

'Why would the vision become clear now?'

'My best guess? She looks about sixteen in the vision, and she's human. If- if the vision is to come true, it'll be at least a couple of years. There seemed to be an entirely different fashion, and even new technology. Maybe it'll take even more than five years. Maybe-'

'Maybe she isn't born yet.'

'Maybe it's become clear because her mother has just gotten pregnant with her.'

Edward's face crinkled at the thought.

'You're going to be a hundred years older than her. And you'll have to change her. Are you certain?'

'You've- knowing what happened to you. If you got a vision of your mate, even knowing they'd be so much younger. Wouldn't you try and find them in an attempt to guarantee your future? Wouldn't you take your only shot at happiness? Even if the circumstances weren't ideal?'

'May I remind you that I did try looking for him? I, the only one who can see where people could go? My visions, and my attempts to find him, haven't helped me. You know I haven't waited around waiting for fate to make us bump into each other. I've looked for him for over twenty-five years and it still didn't help me.'

After having processed his death, she had decided to go to the Cullens anyway. She was in desperate need of friends and family. She knew they'd welcome her with open arms, and without a shot at love, they were the closest she could ever get to an eternal family.

She'd been with them ever since, but like Edward she sometimes took solo trips for multiple months on end to see the world. Places she would have gone with Jasper, places she wanted to see for herself. Anything to fill up the void which would forever be there.

But sometimes the traveling made her more lonely, imagining how it would have been to lean against a strong solid chest while enjoying the views which she gazed at on her own now. They would have made love underneath the stars on the bottom of the grand canyon, swam to the Easter Isles. Life would have been magnificent.

Once Edward found his mate, which according to her calculations would be sometime around 2003, she would be the only one remaining unmated. However, unlike Edward, she knew she'd be alone forever.

Would living like this suffice forever?

She had so much love for her family, and they for her. But was it enough?


	3. 1995

_1995_

_._

_._

_._

A woman's hands beating down against a back of a man.

A man forcing himself upon a woman.

A poor woman with a baby.

A young boy being introduced into a gang.

A young man leaving his past behind and going to war.

A mental clinic.

Broken. Haunted by visions of his past, and the emotions of those he hurt.

PTSD, shell shock, hypersensitivity.

Doctors listed a thousands issues as if the man were a broken machine.

The man being freed. His mother dead. His former friends not what he wanted anymore.

He wasn't fixed. But the government had stopped funding his treatment.

Alice.

A touch.

Meeting eyes.

Blue eyes crossed her golden ones.

Behind his orbs lay not the same person she had lost, but his eyes told of a similar terror plaguing his mind.

.

.

.

When all the visions cleared up Alice had a pounding headache, but she forced herself to focus and write down all the details. She drew sketch after sketch.

He looked almost identical to the man she had once almost met.

She didn't know how or why.

All she knew was that this man meant something to her, for her to see him before she ever even met him.

There were only seven people who had appeared in her mind before she'd met them in real life, and those were the Cullens, Bella and Jasper.

Fate kept pushing honey haired broken men her way.

But this man was decidedly mortal.

What was she to do with him?

Were the similarities with her Jasper a sign of fate? A second chance? Or did she see him for a different reason? Maybe she was to help him.

She had her psychology degree now. And though she looked too young to be employed anywhere for a prolonged period of time, she had been determined ever since Jasper to convince people to stay alive. She'd worked in mental wards before, and as a psychologist. She'd kept ten people from jumping off of bridges and buildings already. This broken soul wasn't going to escape from life like Jasper had.

There had to be a light at the end of the tunnel for him.

And even if fate showed him for not a single reason but for her to keep him from a similar fate like that of his lookalike, she would accept that role in his life.


	4. 2000

_2000_

'Her name is Bella! You're going to meet her in three years!' Alice screamed when Edward entered the house after eight months of absence.

His face lit up like a Christmas tree.

'How wonderful!'

A boyish smile appeared on his face as he swung his littlest sister around.

Hope was such a wonderful expression on his face.

'She's mostly living with her mom now, but she's with another man now. Bella is going to go live with her father in three years time.'

Edward nodded, not incredibly happy that his new mate had to suffer through a broken home, yet glad that she would come to him.

'And you. You know the name of your mystery man.'

'Only partially', she sighed as he put her down.

Edward's face turned grave as the name appeared in her mind.

Jasper.

Fate did seem to play cruel tricks with Alice's heart.

Waking up without a single memory.

Presenting her with the image of her mate and then taking it away from her.

And now, after over 50 years of radio silence, she'd gotten to know that somewhere in the world walked a toddler with the name and face of the one who would have been her husband.

And yet again her visions showed nothing promising.

For the second time in her life she knew of the existence of a blond haired man named Jasper, and for the second time there was an immense risk connected to his mental health. Really, the name seemed cursed in and of itself.


	5. 2007

_2007_

Alice had always missed Jasper's presence in her life.

She was lonely, and prone to bouts of sadness which she never had before his death.

She hadn't been as bubbly as she was supposed to be.

And she never trusted her visions the way she did before 1948.

But never before had his absence from her life been a problem until Bella Swan entered their lives.

She just knew his presence would have been handy during the attack of Victoria's newborn family and during the face-off with the Volturi.

However, the ache of his absence was shrinking with every taste she got of this new man.

She couldn't yet guess how or when they'd meet, or what their connection would be.

But they would at least be friends.

She'd seen them take walks through crowded streets.

She'd seen him smile.

She'd seen him out clubbing with her.

They were just as clear as her visions of Jasper had been.

She tried to keep herself from hoping after how it ended the first time around, but with each vision her resolve crumbled a little bit more.

After all, only a single bad day was needed to take her future away.

If things kept going the way they did now, she could prepare herself for some kind of happiness.

But if something bad happened.

If his mental health took a sudden turn for the worse, everything was at risk again.

She couldn't keep calm about the prospect.


	6. 2013

_2013_

Renesmee was nearing the end of the seven years of growth predicted. Now at a physical age of about sixteen, she was determined to go out clubbing for the first time with three mortal friends and Jacob.

Edward hadn't liked it one bit, and truth be told, neither did Bella.

But since it was "awkward" and "embarrassing" that her parents, despite only looking 17 and 18, would guard her, instead Alice, Rosalie and Emmett were deemed suitable bodyguards. Alice, since she was the "cool" aunt and Rosalie and Emmett because- well really the only reason was that they'd invited themselves because they wanted to dance.

Alice had told Nessie there was a big chance they wouldn't be let in because she and Jacob looked quite young. She knew she and Rosalie, with the right make-up, could convince people that their age ranged anywhere between 17 to 25, and Emmet, with his burly physique, could equally convince most bouncers.

However, with their convincing fake ID's and unnatural beauty, all were let in without even the smallest suspicious glance.

Rosalie and Emmett quickly disappeared into the crowd, no doubt ready to do some dirty dancing.

Macklemore and Katy Perry, two of the radio's most beloved singers the past year or so, were blaring through the boxes.

She took up a position at the bar and enviously gazed at the people doing shots and ordering drinks.

What a comfort would it be to be able to lessen the sensory overload of the music, bass and fluorescent lights with alcohol. What a joy it would be to pick a drink out of a variety of over a hundred drinks. Blood was fine, you had a bit of variety, but all in all blood was blood. To a human it would probably be about the dullness of only eating potatoes for the rest of your life. True, you could boil them, mash them, fry them, but in the end there was only that much variety.

Rihanna, Kesha, Drake and Justin Bieber played as well.

Really, it wasn't her style. Luckily the DJ regularly switched between contemporary music, nineties and naughties and some 80's music.

Some Kate Bush really mended her soul after a rap song.

She pretended to drink while alternating between looking at Nessie and Jake, and studying the crowd of exuberant students when she suddenly became aware of a pair of eyes on her.

Before she could turn to look a brief vision flashed in front of her eyes.

She and the man, dancing.

The lighting and clothes matched with the earlier vision she'd gotten of him in a club some eleven years ago.

Was he here?

What was she going to do?

Was she presentable?

How would he be?

Was he going to be the broken man she'd seen in some visions? Or the dealer she'd seen in others?

She slid off her chair and pulled at the hem of her black dress, which suddenly seemed too tight and too short.

Looking around, he turned out to be hard too miss, sitting in a booth of shiny black leather. On the table in front of him were bottles of vodka and soda, ready to be mingled. The tell-tale sign of wealth. Knowing his past and future, it was clear she would be dealing with Jasper the gang member.

Should she be disgusted that he dealt in drugs that could end op getting others addicted and dead? Knowing his future, knowing he would abandon it eventually, she couldn't bring herself to care.

She hadn't cared about the previous Jasper having killed more people than she'd ever met before. Both Jaspers rolled into their lifestyles with little personal choice.

The corners of his mouth pulled upwards when their eyes connected. He knew she'd spotted him.

But just as excitement started bubbling in her stomach, ice cold fear washed over her.

She was meeting him before his trip with the military. She could prevent him from going and potentially save his mental health. But if she whisked him away now, he might not be the Jasper who she was meant to meet. They were to be friends, but was the character of this younger Jasper the character of the Jasper she befriended? The Jasper in almost all of her other memories was older.

Yet she had seen him here in a vision of hers, so they were destined to meet here as well.

Was she intended to lose him? Was she supposed to let him go and let all those bad things happen to him? Should she prevent it?

She was pulled from her thoughts by a warm hand on her arm.

'Hello there. You look a bit lost.'

'I'm not lost.'

'You shouldn't walk around alone, miss-' His smile was easy and convincing. His shoulders relaxed.

'Alice.'

'Alice', he said while trying out the name on his tongue. It had a southern lilt.

'You're not from around here, are you?'

'I moved 'ere some ten years ago, from Texas.'

Just like the other one. Where they related?

'A Southerner, how exotic', she smiled, trying to keep up the conversation.

He shot her a toothy grin.

'You're from around here I take it. A student?'

'Yes, I'm currently studying art history.'

'I like history, but I've gotta admit I prefer the political and military aspect more than the art side.'

'You see surprisingly little of history in art history actually. It's much more about style movements, techniques, esthetic development, scientific side and so on. But I do enjoy history itself too.'

'Oh, didn't know that. Interesting.'

'What do you study?'

'Nothing much, actually. I work.'

He said it with the clear intention of trying to sound older than he was.

'Oh, what do you do?'

'Construction work.'

Did he? It would explain the amount of muscle, but it had to be a cover up for his real job.

'You don't mind do you? I know many college girls don't like all that rough work.'

Ah, he'd been rejected before.

'Everyone has their preference. I don't care much about what people choose to do, as long as it makes them happy.'

She lifted a questioning eyebrow.

'Well it pays the bills, but it ain't the most interesting thing to do. Maybe I'll study history, once I'm a bit older.'

Just as she expected, he'd been too poor to go to college and he knew his mother would start wondering where he got the money from if he started going to college with the money he made from drug dealing.

'You know you still haven't told me your name, mister.'

'Oh excuse me, milady. Jasper, Jasper Whitlock.'

_Are you kidding me?_ Alice screamed internally. Tomorrow she was going to Texas and dig up the old Jasper's birth certificate. She would trace down his living relatives if he had any. It was simply impossible there were two Jasper Whitlock's from the Texas region with such similar looks.

'Well shortie, if you aren't lost, are you out here on your own? Or have you simply lost track of your friends?'

'Oh no, I know where they are. There's Nessie, Jake, Talia, Jen and Myra, Nessie is the girl with the long hair and the blue dress. And over there are Rose and Emmett, the tall blonde in the red dress next to the even taller muscled man.'

She strained her neck to look up at him. His length was even more intimidating in real life.

'Well, I advise you to go to them, before some of the men here start bothering you.'

'It's fine, I don't mind to be bothered too much.'

He grinned at her a final time.

'Enjoy your night, Alice.'

Ever since meeting him she couldn't stop paying attention to him. She was aware of every move he made.

There were four of them in that booth, and every hour or so a new person came and talked with them. Each time, they were sneakily given plastic bags. He looked business-like and intimidating. She wouldn't have liked to cross him if he had that look about him. Yet he smiled easily, seemingly conveying an image of authority and charm at the same time.

She was dancing between Nessie, Jacob and Nessie's remaining friend, the other two had gone home already. Nessie's friends knew her and liked her well enough, and the music did get better as the night progressed, but she was too distracted to get in the zone.

'Alice, Alice!'

Nessie took her arm and pulled their heads together.

'I know you're supposed to watch over us, but could you please give us some time alone? Please auntie? Please.'

'I can try but if any of us accidentally thinks of it in Edward's presence we're screwed. And especially you two.'

They were young after all.

Forbidding them to be together would be useless. She was as headstrong as both of her parents. If they denied her, she would have no qualms going away to do as she wished the second she looked old enough to leave.

'Thank you. I love you! Don't tell auntie Rose, but you're my favorite aunt.'

Alice laughed and rubbed her hair.

'Away with you! I don't want to think of you two. Shoo!'

Nessie and Jacob disappeared, and Talia had started making out with a boy.

Rose and Emmett were probably all over each other somewhere in a dark corner of the club. Lovely.

_Aren't you something to admire, 'cause your shine is something like a mirror  
And I can't help but notice, you reflect in this heart of mine  
If you ever feel alone and the glare makes me hard to find  
Just know that I'm always parallel on the other side_

'Alone again?' Asked a deep pleasant voice.

'Apparently. I'm in dire need of new friends.'

A pink flash of light illuminated his face. He had large dark bags underneath his eyes.

He smiled, running a hand through his hair in a confident manner. He knew it made him look good. And Alice had to admit it did have a peculiar effect on her belly.

'So it seems. A dance?'

He offered his hand. Alice laughed and took his.

He twisted and turned her in a way that wasn't befitting of a club, before they fell into some easy footwork passes.

_'Cause with your hand in my hand and a pocket full of soul  
I can tell you there's no place we couldn't go  
Just put your hand on the glass, I'm here trying to pull you through  
You just gotta be strong_

He turned her around again, keeping her back pressed against his chest. She followed the swaying of his hips. He was a natural leader, and his smile easily succeeded in making her feel at ease.

'Are you in a dorm?'

'No, I live with my parents.'

Had she been any taller, their cheeks would have been able to touch with the way he bent his head and shoulders. His hands started sliding across her belly, but never too high or too low to be really inappropriate, as far as modern dances were concerned at least.

She leaned her cheek against his arms.

Ten years after Jasper's death and forty years after she'd first woken up, she'd started going out and casually seeing other men. They had all been vampires though. They'd been kind and nice, but no one had ever succeeded in filling up the void.

This was the closest she'd ever been to feeling her heart beat. Never before had she felt so hot. His hot human skin was practically burning hers.

His hands slid to her hands.

'You're freezing, shortie.'

'I know, bad internal heating. I'm sorry.'

'Nah, it's cool.'

'Lame joke', she laughed as he turned her so that she was facing him.

He pressed her towards him again.

'I apologize, ma'am.'

His smile was contagious, his mood infectious. She felt almost tempted to-

'Oh!' she yelped as he lifted her and put her feet on his. She laughed as they awkwardly danced around, she was a little bit closer to his face now.

'Mother nature didn't waste any excess length on you, did she?'

'She gave me as much length as was needed to perfect me. I'm fun-sized.'

'Fun-sized ey? Well I gotta admit, you are quite fun.' Had any other man said that, she would have felt uncomfortable. But there was simply something about him.

'You see?' she laughed.

His hand slid through her locks, and suddenly the smooth exterior faded.

'Fun, smart and beautiful. Your boyfriend must be one lucky man.'

Alice couldn't suppress a laugh. She was over a hundred years, a hundred years and still single. She pitied humans. They always said things like " billions of people on the planet, one must be fit for you" and "you have a lifetime to find true love" yet here she was, living proof that you could spend a lifetime alone.

'What? No boyfriend? Girlfriend?'

'Neither.'

'Oh.'

'Oh? Do all pretty, smart and fun people have to have a partner?'

'Most do. Sharing your life is more fun than being alone.'

'I know.' The loneliness which had disappeared since she'd set eyes on Jasper, was pulling at her heart again.

'By that logic, you should have a girlfriend', she said, determined not to be sad tonight.

'Me?'

He let her go and started toying with the cuffs of his shirt. She could distinguish scars around his wrist, but they were mostly hidden behind tattoos.

'I hardly fit the bill.'

'Well, you've been quite fun up until now.'

'Oh I try to be charming miss Alice, but I wouldn't be so sure about fun.'

'And you don't look bad either.'

'Now yer just straight up lying.'

'Maybe you look better from a lower viewpoint.'

She suddenly found herself being lifted to eye height.  
And what a sight were his eyes. Two shimmering pools of cerulean blue. She wished she could simply dive into them and explore the depths of his soul.

Her throat ran dry, venom slowly pooling on the back of her tongue.

The side of her that thirsted for his blood screamed to taste him.

His eyes looked warier than those of a young man his age should. He had to be about her physical age right now.

Unable to resist temptation, she touched the stubble on his cheek. He flinched at the cold but his eyes never left hers.

Until they closed.

And she closed hers.

And their lips touched.

It was everything and anything, setting her whole body ablaze. Never before had kissing been anything but physically pleasurable, but this kiss made her long for his being. Her legs wrapped around him and she found herself being pressed against the wall which had been near their dancing spot. The cold of her body didn't seem to bother him in the slightest.

His kissing didn't resemble the cool and collected persona he had presented earlier. This man was grasping at her, craving any loving touch he could get.

She was too lost in the sensation of his hot hands caressing her hair, his lips against hers.

She felt his heart beat underneath her hand on his chest. The scent of fresh sweat hung to him, hidden behind a powdery deodorant and a perfume with distinctive leather an patchouli notes. Sage, bergamot and amber clung to his hair.

If she had been any younger, she didn't know if she could have resisted biting him.

The layers of scent combined with the intoxicating aroma of his human blood created the most delicious smell she'd ever experienced, even better than Bella's.

During the kiss she didn't feel the pressure against her temples which preceded vision.

So it took her all by surprise when a vision appeared against her eyelids.  
.

.

.

Red eyes.

A wave of pain.

Overwhelming self-loathing.

Desire.

The image faded to white and turned straight into another vision.

A college auditorium. A painting of the civil war was projected above the chalkboard.

A hand tracing the skin of her leg.

Gleaming golden eyes looking at the screen in fascination.

.

.

.

She was torn from her vision when her feet touched the ground.

Never before had a vision been more emotional than sensory.

Except that second to final vision of the old Jasper, when despair, hurt and hatred had reigned so intensely she had hardly been able to focus on the visual aspect of her vision.

'I enjoyed that point of view.'

'You're a straight up tease, shortie. Not that I don't enjoy this little flirtation but you would better head home. You don't really want me. Now go home and sleep so you can study again tomorrow. I can escort you to a cab if you like?'

'Oh, I'll be perfectly safe.'

'Ya sure? A gust of wind could blow you over.'

'You'd be surprised.'

Just as she prepared to leave, she looked over her shoulder a final time. He was still looking at her.

'Oh and Jasper, I'll decide about whether I want you or not.'

She turned around and walked away before he could answer

This Jasper wasn't ready to meet her yet.

She was to let him go.

But now she knew, that by whatever odd trick of fate, she had gotten a second chance at a mate.


	7. 2013 part 2

He was tired.

The feeling had been present for years now. But never had he felt so urged to do something about it before.

In high school, he'd had dreams like any other kid. But he'd been poor for most of his life, hence any hope of going to college or really making something of his life had never taken any substantial shape or form. So when his stepdad asked him to join his enterprise at age 16, he'd done it. It had been the easy way to make much cash. The only way for someone who wasn't an inventor or college graduate.

But satisfaction he'd never gotten.

And walking home to the small apartment, he had never before been so frustrated by the emptiness of his life.

He couldn't take a girl home to this drug nest.

He couldn't have a girlfriend because of the dealing. Unless she knew of it.

But he'd never before been interested in the girls who wanted him because or despite of the drug trade. They were sisters of involved brothers, involved themselves, or users. But Jasper had never taken any pride or joy in dealing, therefore anyone who accepted the business, was unattractive to him. He didn't want people to love him despite or because of who he was when he himself loathed what he did.

But he craved a girlfriend and he craved being worthy of one, one untainted by the nasty business his family dabbled in. And he didn't want to draw them into poverty.

He thought back of the tiny girl of tonight, dressed in that shimmering black dress with the small Gucci purse and the high Louboutin heels. Her attire screamed money, her face spoke of fun and mischief and her words admitted admirable education. She probably didn't worry about a thing except what to wear and how to cram the material for her tests.

But she looked smart, her eyes were sharp and she had her wit about her. And still ever so charming and tempting. He could still taste her lipstick on his lips. He would've given anything to be a normal man for one night, and be able to take her home and enjoy her company. To sleep next to her petite body which would cuddle up to his, and to offer her coffee in the morning while they discussed something interesting, perhaps agreed on visiting a museum.

But a man the likes of his wasn't worthy of someone like her. Had he been a bad man, he wouldn't have minded that she was so much more and would have taken her anyway. But he wasn't a bad man, and he wouldn't have been able to handle the disgust she would feel once she discovered who he really was.

Maybe it was time for a change.

So that one day, he'd be able to take a girl home without feeling shame at who he was.

He stopped at a poster, glancing up and down at the two men and the two women in combat armour. He'd always been interested in military history and war tactics. The logistical side appealed to him. He'd spent quite a chunk of his part of the drug earnings on videogames when he was sixteen, enjoying the virtual world in which he was a soldier in an army, or a military strategist.

Surely women liked men in uniform a lot.

These men and women would never have to deal with being ashamed of their lives.

Good honest work.

A noble cause.

And the training was free.

Blinking at the poster, he read the information again.

Why had he never considered it before?

Anyone could join the army, no wealth was required. Just a sharp eye, a decent but not too large amount of intellect, and a healthy physique.

Even he would be able to join.

He thought of Alice. And imagined encountering her again. Surely she would think him a great rough fellow, but a respectable man in uniform. Perhaps it presented the ideal contrast to her tame college education, wrapped with a camouflage bow.

He imagined getting love letters from her while overseas, in which she spoke of art exhibitions and expressed worry for him. He'd never before had anyone who really worried for him. His mother had stopped caring about him once she'd lost the baby she'd gotten with his stepdad. She'd never been the same since.

Maybe it wasn't too late for him to turn things around.


	8. 2014

2014

'Are you sure, Alice?'

'Why wouldn't I, dear Eddie?'

'You know why. You still aren't sure what effect your presence will have on his life. Maybe life is intended to push you two together naturally. You've never been able to accurately guess how scenario's are supposed to play out.'

'I know helping visions come out is necessary sometimes. I don't need to remind you of Volterra, do I? If I hadn't picked up Bella and brought her to you, what would've become of you? Sometimes I need to help fate. I've always had my visions. Therefor the visions I get involving myself are visions of me as Alice the Visionary. I even use my visions to hunt, I see myself drinking from a deer in a certain place, so I run towards it. So if I see myself with him, maybe that's because in that vision I acted upon my knowledge of where he'd be.'

'You still haven't thought about what you're going to do once you're there.'

'That's because I can't predict how he'll be, or what I'll have to be to him. I just… I need to keep an eye on him Eddie, no matter in what way. I need to see him to know he's alive and breathing. Seeing him in person just for a couple of minutes settles my nerves. I'm so afraid to lose him. I know that until we are together, there's no way I have any control over him but it puts my mind at rest seeing him and knowing where he is.'

Edward carried two of her suitcases to her car, while she carried the other two.

'I truly wish you the best, Alice. I'm just looking out for you. I can never repay you for how you looked out for me and Bella, to guarantee nothing ever went really wrong, while still giving us room to make errors. If you ever need me to read his mind, I'll be happy to oblige.'

She threw her suitcases in the trunk and threw her arms around her younger brother.

'I know Edward, thank you.'

'Though, in my honest opinion, you'd be better of just turning him. I don't know how you live with the knowledge that he's unstable and mortal.'

'Because though we are meant to be together, there might be a very real possibility he'd hate me if I'd take away his agency and force his destiny upon him. But I'll do my best to push him in the right direction.'

'That might be, but will your push in the right direction keep him out of the way of enemy bullets? The decision for a soldier to choose a target is one that is made in a matter of seconds. Unless you're right next to him, there's no way to protect him overseas.'

'I know. And I don't have a solution for that one and it makes me sick with worry. I'd appreciate it if you didn't bring it up. If he's anything like his great great great great uncle, he'll be fine though.'

And so Alice left, and picked up two friends from her Art History education. Once she decided she needed to see Jasper again, she'd made an effort to befriend some fun and easy-going mortal girls whom she could easily convince to go on a holiday. She didn't want Rose, Bella, Esme or Renesmee present when she met him again. Something felt private about meeting him.

And so she and her human friends embarked on a trip near a military base.

They went sight-seeing.

They went shopping.

They went clubbing.

And finally, one night, to Alice's delight, they ended up in a dance café where four tv-screens hung against the walls of wooden boots where girls danced on the banks while reading the lyric overlay in front of the music videos. Some men were standing around the bar and party tables, more concerned with drinking and laughing than dancing.

On the screen was a crocodile crawling through a basement while OneRepublic was singing.

_Lately I been, I been losing sleep  
Dreaming 'bout the things that we could be  
Baby I been, I been prayin' hard  
Said no more counting dollars  
We'll be counting stars  
Lately I been, I been losing sleep  
Dreaming 'bout the things that we could be  
But baby I been, I been prayin' hard  
Said no more counting dollars  
We'll be, we'll be counting stars_

_I feel the love  
And I feel it burn  
Down this river every turn  
Hope is a four letter word_

How come all songs reflected her feelings when she went out lately? Ever since the previous Jasper died she'd been living in an instrumental world, unable to connect with vocals. Yet now, in the era in which the far removed cousin of the first Jasper lived – as her current Jasper was indeed the distant cousin of the past Jasper, she connected to the music again, though the songs really weren't as good as the 80's jams.

She'd like to say she recognized him immediately, but truth be told she didn't. She recognized his smell, but couldn't pinpoint where he was. It was busy, and all the military men present in the café had the same outfit and hairstyle.

Goodbye lovely manes, she thought to herself while remembering of his luscious locks from the last time she saw him.

They'd grow back, of course, once he quit the military.

Avicii, two Iggy Azalea songs and Bastille passed as she danced with her friends, trying not to be too obvious while looking for him. She was glad her vampire nature made it possible to be so fast to be able to do things unnoticed, and was able to look sharply without staring.

And then – there he was.

He shoulders seemed broader then the last time she'd set her eyes on him some eight months ago, and his bare arms were ripped with muscle.

Hot.

A vampire's physique couldn't change, and she wouldn't mind having him by her side forever, but right now she was more than happy with his human capacity to change and develop.

He walked past her while drinking from his beer. One of his buddies pushed against him with his elbow. He spilled his drink and slowed down to wipe his mouth when he spotted her.

She briefly smiled at him but continued to dance where she stood. Eight months was a long time for a human, she wasn't about to act weird and familiar when there was a big chance she meant nothing to him. It was very likely he wouldn't remember a girl he'd only spent 2 hours with eight months , knowing their future, there was a chance he at least remembered her.

'Shortie, funny seeing you here.'  
'Oh, hi Jasper. Didn't expect to see you here.'

His eyes lit up when she pronounced his first name.

'You remember me.'  
'And you me'', Alice laughed, 'but that doesn't answer my question. How do you come to be here? I thought you worked in –'

'I quit. Changed jobs.'

'You're an interesting man. Going from wanting to study history, to working in construction and now being in the military.'

'Being in the military isn't that weird for me', he smiled.  
'Guess I don't know you enough to tell, but alright, mr Military Man. At least the look suits you.''  
'Does it now?'

She just pretended to drink while using her straw, smiling coyly at him.

'What brings you here?'  
'Nothing special, just a girls trip.'

He only seemed to notice the other girls once she drew attention to them.  
'Oh yeah, is it like a holiday or something?'  
'No, we're just skipping uni before spring break, because then everything will be crowded.'  
'Naughty.'  
'Are you going to report me now that you're part of a brother organisation of the police?'  
'We're so not a brother organisation of the police.'

She shrugged her shoulders.

'I don't know, you seem very much like part of the fun police, telling me that I'm bad for skipping school now that you're part of the uniformed services. But then again, you sent me home so I would be a good schoolgirl the next day.'

The teasing phrasing and voice had an immediate effect on Jasper, whose eyes burned like fire.

'I'm off duty today and tomorrow.'

'Oh?'

Before their interactions she would have never guessed they would engage in such teasing and banter. She had always thought their conversations would be deep and meaningful, and filled with long stretches of silence in which their eyes told each other things that couldn't be spoken.

But instead, here they were flirting, and a tight coil in Alice's belly made it hard for her to focus. Her skin seemed electrically charged. She had imagined passion, love, worry, but not this suffocating overwhelming anxiety as she was unable to predict where the next couple of hours would take her. She had an intense feeling of falling.

'Can I offer you a drink?'

Refusing him would be bad and ruin whatever it was he was building towards. But she couldn't accept. What was she to do with the drink?

'I'm good, but if you wanna… you know, talk or dance, that's fine to me.'

'And do ye wish it yourself?'

'If you're off duty for the fun police as well.'

'I will be.'

'Perfect.'

* * *

Two hours later she found herself pressed against a wall for the second time in their acquaintance, though this time it was in a more private spot.

The bravado and flirting dissipated, and he seemed somewhat insecure as to what to do next. His insecurity, and gentle handling, brought Alice back from her hormone-fuelled high as well, as she suddenly became aware she was alone with her soulmate. And anything she did, could have permanent consequences. Of course, on a rational level she knew that every word they shared and everything they did had consequences, and that she very much desired this outcome. She should rejoice in the fact that he was attracted to her as well.

Yet she couldn't help the anxiety. A century of being alone, and over half a decade of believing herself to be destined to be alone forever, suddenly made it hard for her to cross the bridge. It all seemed so drastic and permanent. And here he was, her mate, just a nineteen year old boy who would still have to face so many horrors. She wanted to hide him from the world and prevent anything bad from happening to him.

How could she leave him, knowing what was to come?

Could she?

Should she?

His hands were ever so gently stroking her hair as he kissed her, unaware of her inner turmoil. She felt as if she could shatter at the touch. Such gentleness. Such inexperience.

Had the previous Jasper lived, he would have been the experienced one, introducing Alice to everything while she'd only have to bring her natural eagerness.

'You're cold again', he murmured as he drew back.

'What is it, I can just feel that you're thinking. You- this is still okay right?'

Alice nodded, forcing a shiny smile. He shook his head. As insightful as the last one.

'What is it?'

'Nothing significant, just… Thinking of the past.'

'You haven't drank nearly enough if you do.'

'I know.'

His thumb and index finger captured her chin with loving care.

'Do you want to think about the past?'

'No.'

She could read the recognition of a kindred soul who was also fleeing the sadness of his past.

'Do you want me to make you forget?'

'Please', she begged as she pulled his hair.

The action was instant. Stroking her hair, tugging at her bra, sucking her nipples. It was lovely, but not enough. How could he, with his human strength which was nothing compared to the power and firmness of her diamond body?

But then there was this thing. This pull. Unlike any vampire she'd bedded, he extracted all these feelings from her, leaving her unhinged and wanting. Every sigh, ever movement of hers, was registered and acted upon, so instinctively attuned was he to her body.

'More', she sighed.

She had no need for his gentle lovemaking.

She needed guarantees. Guarantees of his strength and resilience. He would need it so.

A groan escaped his lips, as he unleashed a violence upon her he had reigned in before.

And in turn, Alice let her savage nature out, clenching her hands around his arms, biting and sucking his neck while making sure she didn't perforate skin, and scratching his back.

And in their passion, they ignited their flame, and crumpled down on the closed toilet seat together. She made herself small as she hid her face against his sweaty chest.

She was so incredibly hungry.

Being with him had filled her with a hunger similar to not feeding in a month.

As they dressed, Alice noticed the bruises forming all over his chest, hips and arms. Dark purple bruises lined his neck and red lines, some even with traces of blood, marred his chest.

There was no way anything but the hickeys could be passed off as natural, but he seemed oblivious to them.

She'd hurt him, but he didn't seem to notice in his bliss.

He'd clearly enjoyed it though, how confusing. But wasn't… Wasn't that what Bella had said as well? Having sex with Edward as a human had been the most mind-blowing thing for her, even if it hurt her physically. But Bella knew what Edward was.

How would Jasper explain the bruises? Should she tell him? What effect would that have?

She considered telling him, and immediately a vision struck her in which he stepped away from her in fear and confusion. Okay, no then. So, in her visions in which he was older, he'd been able to deal with this without explanation? Or weren't they supposed to have had sex? Had she changed her future? Would she still get to be together with him?

So many questions, they made her head hurt.

'Hey, I asked if you enjoyed it?'

'Oh, yes. Very much', she replied while pressing her lips against his.

'No more accusations of me being part of the fun police?'

'No, the fun police would say that was public indecency, misdemeanour, and punishable.'

He laughed, until a frown appeared on his forehead.

'Your eyes… They seem darker.'

'Those will be my enlarged pupils because I'm staring at something I like', she laughed while hiding her face against his chest. 'And eyeliner and bad lighting. I don't know, they've always been something of a golden colour usually. They do however get lighter when I cry, don't ask me why.' It was typical of humans to overshare and tell stories, so she did, and it seemd to put him at ease.

'I don't know, I've only ever seen you in bad lighting. I'm probably still going to be surprised by their colour when I see you during daylight.'

'You're going to see me during daylight?'

'Do you want to see me during daylight?'

He laughed and kissed her cheek.

'Maybe, I still have that day off tomorrow. If you don't mind being without your friends. You came here on a girls trip.'

'I did, but maybe I can get away.' And then he gave her his number.

The next day was incredibly sunny, so Alice pretended to have a hangover and cancelled both the plans the girls had and Jasper.

And in the evening, her girlfriends, the absolute cockblockers, wanted to go to another club while going out. Jasper didn't manage to get his friends to that club, and they had to get up early the next day, so that was that.

But at least now she knew he was still healthy.

Alice didn't hear from him anymore, and after finishing Art History, she started working at a mental hospital. She sent him a text for Christmas and the New Year, and Easter, but they went unreplied. She'd planned on starting this job even before she met Jasper some two years ago, but it was only when, one evening, on going through the files of some new patients, she recognized his name, and realized:

This was the next point of her visions.


	9. August 2014

**August 2014**

Dying on the first mission was like getting pregnant from the first time you had sex. You knew the chance existed, but you couldn't dwell on it, and it wasn't _that_ likely.

He'd known some could die when they embarked on a mission just one month after they finished their training. It was a secret mission, and they had to leave their phones behind. Only letters were allowed.

But he hadn't expected, or been prepared for that matter, for what would happen.

Two of his group died during the first week.

One died of his injuries a day later.

By week three, only sixty percent remained.

One by one they fell: the joker, the husband, the only father, the two women, the one who always defeated everyone in one on one combat.

Until only three remained.

He was on edge by then. Incredulity had transformed into acceptance, and he was simply counting the days until he would fall and join his brothers.

The bombing never ended. It seemed like years since he heard silence, or felt safe. He was tired, drained. He could barely remember how to laugh.

He hadn't slept in days. And had been too tired to notice the five snipers sneaking up on them until it was too late.

He'd managed to find cover, but had only been able to protect himself during the flurry of bullets flying everywhere.

By the time reinforcements arrived, he was the only one left alive.

Jasper Whitlock.

Sole survivor.

The sharpest shot of they boys he'd trained with.

But to what use? He'd taken out plenty of enemies, but in the end his talent hadn't saved the only friends he'd ever cared about since primary school.

The weight of his lost friends.

The sickness in his gut when he thought of the amount of people he'd killed, of the women, children and parents at home for everyone on both sides.

Millions of lives forever touched and ruined, yet he without friends, family or a partner lived while his life barely made any difference to someone out there.

He'd thought of her sometimes.

The short haired girl.

He could barely remember her face now.

Not that he wanted to. He didn't even want to think of her. When he thought of her, he thought of hope and happy feelings he didn't deserve. He felt like he tainted her by simply thinking of her. A murderer unable to protect his friends.

A man too damaged to be grateful for the fact that his shitty ass still lived. Good men with full lives died, and he was wasting his own away. Yet how could he live and laugh knowing so many worthy men had died? Even a single smile felt wrong, for how could he be happy, if they and their families had died? He should be grieving.

His mind kept running in the same circles, unable to battle the darkness.

His body twitched at every sound.

Yet despite his failure, the military decided to offer him help.


	10. January 2015

**January 2015**

He looked up when the man before him slipped through the blue door with a "3" on it. There were five rooms connected to the waiting room of this level of the mental ward. They were focussed on PTSD and veterans.

He took a deep breath, knowing whatever they had to say wouldn't chance anything about how he felt. The most important aspect of recovery was wanting to change, and Jasper didn't know if he could muster the energy for it.

As he plopped down on the chair, he stared at the table in front of him, not even bothering to look at the psychologist in front of him.

The other side was silent for a long while, apparently in no haste to start the conversation. In the end, curiosity finally managed to get through the darkness filling his mind. He looked up.

Golden eyes.

Black hair with heavy bangs.

An insecure smile playing around her lips.

'You studied art history.'

'I did. And something else.'

She must have been a lot older than she appeared if she had two degrees.

All the insecurity and the feeling of inadequacy he'd felt before came rushing back, together with an incredible amount of shame at appearing even weaker and uglier in front of her now.

He was a patient now, so beneath her he could barely look her in the eye.

And now she sat in front of him, knowing every detail about his shitty life.

Knowing how fucked up he was.

And seeing the scars on his face and arms from the explosion that had finally sent him home.

As if the surprise of discovering her on the other side of the table wasn't enough, she did something else he completely didn't expect. She shoved his medical file towards him.

'I think you deserve to know what's been written about you. You can take your time to read it. You're my last appointment today.'

PTSD, shell shock, hypersensitivity, difficult childhood, his psychological profile that was written about mid-training: focussed, logistical, analytical. One bright dot amongst a sea of darkness.

'Well, what is your opinion on it?'

'It appears I'm a mess ma'am. There are few things that aren't wrong with me.'

'Do you feel that way?'

'I have about every mental illness there is.'

Alice rolled her eyes and put her hand on a pile of DSM books on her desk. 'Do you see how thick these books are? You can't possibly have everything. Now, what you do have is strongly related to each other, which is both a blessing and a curse. Because the effect of your shell shock leads to hypersensitivity, and your childhood and personality make you more prone to taking the blame of what happened during your mission. But if we treat one thing, it should help with lightening the symptoms of other things as well.'

'And how do you suggest we do that?'

'Depends.'

'Depends? Aren't you the psychologist? Shouldn't you tell me what's best for me and how to make me whole again?'

'Isn't this your life, Jasper? Shouldn't you have a say in how we treat you? There's the traditional route with antidepressants and clinical psychology but… we could try without drugs at first if you'd like? After all, they have strong effect, mute emotions, and...'

'No drugs. I'd like to know when I feel things. And I need to feel it. I need the guilt, the pain… My friends have died, I can't shut myself off to the effect of their deaths, that's ungrateful. Not that I… Feel much more than numbness most days.'

'But you still feel, that's good. Numbness is your biggest enemy.'

'Is there a way to get out of this?'

'Yes.'

'How long?'

'I don't know.'

Forcing himself through the embarrassment of having to receive psychological help from a woman he'd once fucked against a wall, they decided, after a couple of sessions, that the thing that would benefit him most, would be enabling him to see a future. For now he lived in an eternal present of pain. Seeing no way out and no brightness on the horizon. He couldn't return to his old life, which was bad. And he couldn't imagine going on another mission for the military. So it was back to square one all over again.

All the friends he'd had had died, and he wasn't cheerful enough to make new ones. And girlfriends… Well. That was a whole other problem, since he couldn't get Alice out of his head, but that he wouldn't tell her.

She wasn't what he had imagined a therapist to be, not that he'd had any previous experience. It was a great relieve to him that she wasn't the stony faced old man he'd expected. She tried her best not to look at him with pity, and seemed just as desperate as him to find a solution for his future, and he felt her frustration when they reached another dead end. It seemed she took his failure to become better very personal.

X.X.X.

'There are jobs in the military that don't require active combat.'

'I know. But there's only two things I wanted to do here: combat and climbing up high enough to… nevermind. There's just nothing that interests me that I can reach here.'

Except a pay check, something he would really need. He'd been on leave for two months now.

'You wanted to become a history major, remember?'

It was something he hadn't brought up in the past two months.

It was something he had confided to her Before. Before everything.

And suddenly he thought back on how she had actually been the last push to leave his previous living situation and join the military. He wanted to have a life in which he made honest money and didn't feel so ashamed of himself anymore, a life in which a girlfriend was possible.

'Yes, but how am I going to finance that?'

'You still got some reserves, right?'

'I do. But what if they stop financing my sessions? I'll quickly run out of money if I have to pay for these sessions.'

'Let's not rush like that. We'll do our best to get you to the best possible mental space before the time comes. Let's just assume you still have a bit of funds.'

'Yeah.'

'You could combine studying with a job, many do. And it doesn't have to be a big uni, does it? It could offer you topics and intellectual challenges, even when your day job is boring. And then once you have your degree, you could pick a job you really enjoy.'

'Sounds so nice and easy.'

'It won't be, but it's a possible future.'

'It just seems. So unlikely.'

'But would you like it?'

He toyed with the idea in his head, and as he was occupied, he didn't notice how Alice's eyes lost focus or the way she clenched her hands in her lap.

When she looked up again, he was staring out of the window.

'I can hardly envision such a life. What kind of job would I have. How would I have to spend my money?'

'Do you want me to paint you a picture, to make it look more… Plausible?'

He nodded and she continued painted a detailed picture, with enough details of possible financial struggles, and difficulty combining his job and college to make it possible. But then she described essays he'd write, classes he'd attend, conversations he could have. It seemed so real. So possible. She didn't hide the potential difficulties but it was the first time a future sounded appealing and realistic.

'If I could have it the way you described it… I would take the chance, immediately.'

'Why couldn't you have it that way?' She asked with a smile.

'I'm not… Ever…. Lucky that way. It's been years since I've had to study for something as simple a public school exam. I'm out of practice, and probably unfit for college. I'll probably ruin it within the first month.'

'Then you won't fight for it.'

'Excuse me?'

'How could you elsewise fail something you're so interested in? Must be because you won't do your best.'

'So many people want something and try very hard to have it, doesn't mean they'll ever reach it. See The Great Gatsby, kids struggling to play instruments, people with cancer wanting to heal… The list is endless.'

'Yeah, but we're talking college. Not romantic interests or terminal illness. You can't make someone love you, you can't make your body heal. You can, however, work hard, revise regularly, and commit to your studies. You can learn to use an agenda to split up your time efficiently. You can learn to become better at things. Almost everyone naturally drowns, yet most learn how to swim in the end. We all fell while learning to walk, yet we learned, improved and are now walking humans.'

A small flat, an easy job that paid just enough to make ends meet, finally studying history.

'Maybe you even find some friends in those auditoria, to discuss topics with like politics, history, science, the future, humankind… Perhaps even a girlfriend?'

People with the same interests. Educated people. People who had dreams and visions and weren't going to die in a war unless the United States were going to be attacked.

'Yeah, now we're really talking fantasy.'

'In my humble opinion, it's more realistic that you'll make friends during those years in college, than the idea that you won't meet anyone you can agree with or form an acquaintance with in over five years. Come now, you can't be so arrogant as to think that in a room with hundreds of people who love the same topics, you won't find anyone you'll agree with?'

'Put like that, it does seem weird.'

'Of course, it's because I'm right. As you said during our first session: I should know what's best for you.'

Her teasing smile almost made him feel like he did a year ago, before he turned away and sighed.

She was only being kind to him because he was her patient.

Anything she would've felt for the flirtatious man she'd seen those two times they met before, must have surely died when she discovered his fucked up past and saw how bad he was mentally.

She'd always deserved a rich, smart and handsome man.

But now Jasper wasn't even a whole man emotionally.

He didn't see how her expression dulled as he, again, ignored her attempt to draw a smile out of him.

**X.X.X.**  
In a turn of events which surprised Jasper, the numbness in his chest did lighten. And he discovered an odd excitement now that he had decided on what to do with his future. As the months passed, the shell shock naturally dissipated, and the PTSD slowly abated, but the survivor's guilt was still there, as was his lack of self-confidence.

He couldn't say he felt happy. But he did feel excitement and even, under Alice's guidance, the strange yet fascinating hope which she seemed to always bring forth in him. She seemed so sure of his future and his capabilities. Never before had anyone shown such fate in him.


	11. April 19th 2015

**April 19th 2015**

'Hello Ben', Alice smiled as she walked into her ward after a three week holiday.'

'Hey, I've left files on your desk. I'm afraid the pile has gotten quite big however.'

'Oh fine, I'll be able to get through it. I'm a big girl', she smiled.

As she walked past him she rolled her eyes. Another co-worker who couldn't help drooling at her. That was something she hadn't missed while she was away.

She didn't have any appointments the next two days, as she knew a human would need about two days to get through all the files she had collected. However, with her vampire powers she could work through them in less than three hours.

Halfway through however, her red lacquered nails stopped while turning the termination file of a patient, suddenly her brain caught on that she wasn't just reading about any person.

Jasper Whitlock. Ending of recovery funding. Refusal for self-paid continuation.

But he didn't have an apartment yet! Where would he go to if he quit his military job? Where would he go in the meantime? Where was he?

She sped through the others reports, before exciting her office with a pile of reports she'd read, pretending to take them with her to work from home. But instead, once at her apartment, she focussed on procuring any vision she could.

He'd been progressing wonderfully before she left. They'd worked out so much already, she'd arranged a visit with a financial advisor right before she left. But he hadn't quit the military yet and he hadn't found a place to live. Two things he needed before finding a new job. It was April now, he would have to work on college applications as well if he wanted to start in September.

Could he have returned to his former home? She thought it very unlikely. Yet where else could he have gone to? The notice dated from two days before she left, but she hadn't looked at her paper pile back then, and she hadn't seen Jasper those last two days.

By now he must have left the facility about a week ago.

She thought back of all the visions she'd gotten of him.

She remembered seeing him at the grave of his mother.

She remembered encountering him during daytime, no club or office in sight.

She remembered touch.

Meeting eyes.

Blue eyes crossed her golden ones.

She remembered visions which spoke of friendship.

She'd seen them take walks through crowded streets.

She'd seen him smile at her.

She'd seen walking to her with a duffel bag, coming back from class.

She'd seen him in a couch opposite of her working on a paper with glasses perched on the tip of his nose.

She'd seen him with bags underneath his eyes, still working late shifts during finals season.

Red eyes.

A wave of pain.

Overwhelming self-loathing.

Desire.

A college auditorium. A painting of the civil war was projected above the chalkboard.

A hand tracing the skin of her leg.

Gleaming golden eyes looking at the screen in fascination.

**X.X.X**

She didn't know if they would all come true, or if some visions had become untrue because she'd meddled in his life. All she knew was that, despite her meddling, she was always a part of his future, always in a way that seemed romantic.

She decided that the vision of his mother's grave would probably be the one closest to the present date. His mother lived states away.

Sher ran. Catching and drinking plenty of deer and other mammals she found on her way through wooded areas, making sure she wouldn't be hungry by the time she met him. She kipped from graveyard to graveyard in the city she'd first met him, until she finally found the grave from her vision.

Kendra Whitlock, she'd given her maiden name to her boy. She had never even discovered the name of the man who'd impregnated her with Jasper.

She'd died at 39, complications of childbirth. She knew he'd had a stillborn brother and that his mother had never been the same since. Yet he'd still loved her.

Alice decided to wait, hoping she was on time for her vision to come true. She waited two days until she picked up on Jasper's delicious tantalizing smell.

Venom pooled in her mouth. She'd completely stuffed herself before she got here. She couldn't possibly be hungry? She was over a century old, and wasn't as bothered by blood as say Emmett. She didn't understand why his blood called out to her more than before.

A desolate Jasper struggled towards the simple head stone. His mother had died three months ago, just about a month after his therapy started.

He crumpled through his knees. Heavy sobs shaking his body. She'd never seen him cry.

Never seen him break down.

He always pulled back into himself. Rarely did he allow for his emotions to seep through his exterior, unless he wanted people to know about them. They were always filtered and as pleasant as possible. Even his desperation and sadness were talked about, talked about to great lengths, but rarely did his face betray the messy emotions. Only his eyes spoke more clearly about the intensity of his feelings.

He didn't think anyone was watching him now.

She hated seeing him at his lows. There seemed to be a never-ending amount of them however, and she dearly wished life would stop being cruel to him.

She would have loved giving him space and privacy, but he didn't have anywhere to go to anymore.

Suddenly his arms buckled, and he crashed down on top of the grave.

Odd.

She walked over to him, the sobbing stopped slowly. His breathing was uneasy and shallow, instead of deep and ragged.

'Jasper?'

He looked at her, only half aware of her presence.

She was immediately alarmed.

_No._

_No._

She pulled at his clothing, his wrists revealing shaggy red lines and his breath smelled of liquor.

'You stupid man!'

She could've hit him if she hadn't thought the act could effectively detach his head from his body.


	12. April 20th 2015

**April 20th 2015**

He awoke on a soft couch in a strange living room.

It was dark. No one to be seen.

His head was throbbing.

_Fucking hangover._

His arms were bandages. Good, the wounds he'd gotten from the knife fight with one of his father's partners were starting to look ugly before. He'd been unarmed when he walked through the door of his former home, so he had to defend himself from any stab wounds with his hands, until he could find a weapon.

How did he get here?

He ghosted through the room, looking for personal belongings, when he discovered the row of pictures above the television. A family of seven children, and two young looking parents. Or at least, that's what the portrait looked like. No one seemed to have any resemblance to each other. But Alice was in it, between a honey haired man, a brown haired girl, a blonde woman, a man with curly brown hair and an auburn haired girl. He recognized the last three, they'd been with her in the club two years ago. He thought they had been a couple, but were they family as well? The next picture was of the brown haired teens with a younger looking girl from the previous picture. Odd, the teens didn't seem any different in appearance, but the young girl in the picture was undoubtedly the girl from the club, only she appeared to be only about nine years old. They must age strangely. Alice still looked like she was in her early twenties, yet she had two degrees, which would have at least taken nine years, and she'd been working for a year. She had to be at least 28.

The next picture was a bridal party with in the center the brown haired couple, and around them everyone but the youngest looking girl.

There was also a picture of Alice at a graduation with the four other siblings, and the couple who appeared to be their parental figures, though they were definitely to young to have birthed them. Maybe they had adopted them as teens when they themselves were in their twenties? That could be why the blonde and the black haired one were in a relationship. Or perhaps one of the brown haired teens and one of the hot couple were simply in these pictures because they were dating the kids? Maybe blondie met the big guy during high school, and maybe the bronze haired boy had fallen in love and married his high school sweetheart as well. He knew some of his army friends had been invited to holidays and family picture moments of their sweethearts.

So he was in Alice's house.

How had he gotten here?

How had she found him?

An itch on his arm drew his attention to the fact that they were bandaged.

_Oh no. _

Why did Alice always see him at his lowest. So needy, so desperate. Such a weak coward.

He should go, before she woke up.

He wanted to hide from her for the rest of his existence.

Yet at the same time, he wanted to pull open every door to discover her bedroom, and join her there to make her his. But what good would that do? In the morning she'd wake up for work, and he'd stay behind because he was a wreck without a job, a home or a life.

Almost as if she could sense that he was having a difficult time, the door to her bedroom opened. A soft light lit the contours from her body, making her room appear like heaven and she as an angel who had come to fetch him. It drew him, like a moth to a flame.

'Jasper?'

'How did you find me?'

'I have my ways.'

'Why?'

She didn't answer.

'Why did you take me with you?'

'I could hardly leave you there.'

'Do you do that for all your patients?'

'I've saved others from killing themselves, yes.'

'Have you taken them inside your home as well.'

'Well… No.'

'Why me?'

She shook her head.

'Why me?'

'Where else will you go?'

'Out of pity? Because I have nowhere else?'

'Not only that, you know that. Please, just… Stay. We can help you find a job, a nice apartment, you can stay here until things work out. You can't stay at the military base.'

'It's too much. I can't take this, all this kindness anymore.'

She took his hand in hers, his ugly marred big hand in her small dainty one. Yet it was a perfect fit. He closed his eyes. Not wanting to see it anymore.

He couldn't stand the way she made his heart jump. The way her eyes begged him to live. The way her words gave him such comfort and hope. He didn't deserve it. And he only got it because he was too weak to manage on his own.

But he was too weak to put up a fight. Try as much as he might, he couldn't deny himself the closeness to her beauty.

She'd always told him of how everything he wanted was possible.

Yet he couldn't believe it when he finally managed to land a construction job. The hours were irregular but that was precisely what allowed him to attend class, and though it was heavy labour, it wasn't as horrifyingly heavy or underpaid as waitering.

When she finished work and came home, always after dinner, they pored over flats together, and she helped him apply to colleges. She was a great help, and ever so kind and cheerful. He could almost forget how he'd been a patient of her the past couple of months, so easy and natural did it feel to talk to her.

They took evening strolls, and he was amused by the stories she told and her vibrant spirit which constantly wished to climb buildings or do impulsive things.

He knew she cared deeply about a great many things, but not a single problem seemed to be able to weigh her down. And like a starving man to a buffet, he was attracted to her lust for life.


	13. September 2015

**September 2015**

Jasper Whitlock could finally say his life was finally on the rails. He had a job, he was accepted in a small college that wasn't too expensive, and he still had contact with the most gorgeous woman on earth. What she, a twice graduated from Ivy League schools, saw in a former drug dealer and an veteran who barely survived his first mission, he didn't know, but he was glad he got to enjoy her presence.

They saw each other about once a month since he moved out, and she had easily given up her role as his therapist and become more of a listening ear and advising friend when something was amiss. She also picked up the playful informality again which had been there Before his life had gone to shambles in 2014.

Until now, they'd visited a museum, gone to a movie, taken a walk through the park and had simply wandered through the city once.

Their next get together was soon approaching when one day, while returning from campus, he spotted her in the shopping street together with an attractive looking older man with a beard. His hair was long and his sense of style seemed very much a modern reinterpretation of the dandy look, with his shirt and vest and shawl. Just as fashionable as Alice, and just as rich, judging by the bags that hung over their arms. He probably took her company for granted, just two smart handsome people hanging out together. A far cry from Jasper who was literally blessed with her presence. She was laughing openly bumping him as they were walking. Beside them walked the blond and black haired couple. How fine those four looked together.

It struck him how they were together, despite being adoptive siblings. So who was this man? Was he her boyfriend and were they out on a double date? Or was he a cousin they were spending time with?

Jasper could barely contain the envy and jealousy filling him as he stomped off to his apartment.

**X.X.X**

'So, have you met someone since… You know… Back when you said you were single?' Jasper asked inconspicuously. Surely, it wasn't weird for friends to ask about each other's love life.

Her eyes were sharp, however.

'What do you mean by "met someone"? Are you asking me whether I am in love, have a partner or am dating?'

'All three?'

She laughed.

'I am in love. But I'm not dating or in a relationship.'

Was she in love with that guy?

Didn't he want her?

What was wrong with him?

She hushed him before he could ask any further questions, and pressed on play for the next Stranger Things episode.

**X.X.X.**

It was fine until October, when he went to a Halloween party which had been advertised on campus. Alice had though it a great idea, and was begging him to dye his growing hair so that he would resemble Dracula.

He'd invited her, of course, since she was his security blanket still. And since she had been nagging he should go, he thought it only fitting that she would go as well.

The music was bearable, Alice was bubbly, and Jasper could almost imagine she was making the same eyes at him as when he'd first kissed her years ago, back when he was eighteen. After almost a year of feeling bad, he finally felt alive again, and that feeling intensified whenever he was around her. He could pick up on her emotions easily, and her cheerful nature was easy to be around. And tonight, her looks ignited something within him he'd thought had died while abroad.

He'd went to fetch them drinks, happily hoping that maybe tonight, he could be enough for her.

But then when he returned, he saw Alice being kissed by a jock.

And really, that was too much for him to take. He fled the scene without seeing how violently Alice pushed the boy away from her.

**X.X.X **

Alice didn't hear anything from Jasper for weeks. The only thing she got was a text message from October 31st saying that he suddenly started feeling unwell.

She didn't want to drop by his apartment. She refused to give him the feeling she was still watching over him like in the clinic. She'd had such a struggle trying to convince him she saw him as something other than her ex-patient. A part of her still wasn't sure if he knew he had never been just a patient to her. No, he needed to come to her on his own terms, he wasn't in mortal peril. He wasn't going to die on her, so she had no right to control him. She'd always detested Edward's paranoia-fuelled stalker-tendencies.

She quit her job, unable to focus. She'd been there for too long anyway. She didn't want them to start noticing. It was about time for her to leave and start a new identity again. But what would she do with Jasper? How could she explain a change of identity, without telling him who she was? She'd have to move to another state. How could she keep in touch?

Not that it mattered. If she couldn't find him, she couldn't tell him.

Her gift was abandoning her.

No new visions came.

She desperately replayed all the visions she'd had. She'd seen Jasper with glasses in her visions, those still hadn't come true. But then again, she'd also seen the previous Jasper in stages of their lives that had never come to be true.

Was this supposed to happen?

Had something gone wrong?

Yes, something had gone wrong at the party, but she'd pushed the other man away! She'd thought they were finally evolving towards the great something.

She was done with waiting.

She loved getting to know him. She greatly enjoyed flirting with him in the past. She delighted in looking at him. The deep conversations, the jesting ones, the prolonged looks.

Every day she could see the hope growing in his eyes.

She could see his smile returning, ever so hesitantly, when he talked about the courses he was taking.

It excited her, yet it gnawed at her that the more she pushed him towards a future, the crueller she'd be once she took it from him.

Because it wouldn't just cut short his chance at a normal life with children. She knew what being a vampire could do to him. If he had the same gift, and same struggle with bloodlust, it could destroy him.

She would curse him to decades of struggling with his bloodlust before it came bearable, all while he felt the pain of those he killed.

Though… This Jasper wouldn't have a century of pent of regret and a crippling depression. This one hadn't killed hundreds of humans and vampires. He hadn't been in Maria's army. Maybe if she immediately integrated him in the Cullen family, it wouldn't be so hard.

Maybe.

But there were no guarantees.

_  
Did you recognize the mentioning of Garrett?

Comments:Thank you DxGRAYxMAN, Meagan and Anon for your encouraging comments!


	14. December 2015

**20:03 on July 23th. Updated to fix some mistakes and respond to comments 3**

* * *

** '****15/12/13 **

**14:34**

**How is everything going with your finals? Need any help rehearsing? X A**

**18: 21**

**I'm getting by, thanks J**

**'****15/12/17**

**19:20**

**Hey, how is it going? A**

**19:25**

**Harder than expected. I think I succeeded up till now. J**

**19:27**

**Does that offer still stands? J**

**19:28**

**Sure! A**

**X.X.X**

'Jasper, hey', she smiled as he let her in.

His wavy hair now grazed his shoulders, and surprisingly, glasses adorned his nose.

'Come in.'

'You got yourself a new accessory?'

'It appears this college thing isn't kind on my eyes. It's only for reading though.'

'Mhm, makes you look smart. Not that you looked stupid before.'

He seemed doubtful as to what to do, obviously feeling awkward while trying to mend the two months of absence on his side.

Some two years ago, he had ignored the odd bruises she'd given him.

Was it now her turn to ignore his disappearance the past two months?

'How have you been?'

'Terribly busy, I'm sorry. I wasn't dealing with that work-study balance all too well. I'm sorry if it appeared personal.'

It was a lie and they both knew it.

'No problem. How many do you have left?'

'Only one. History of the Ancient Near East, really not my thing. And it's a class I often had to miss due to my working schedule. Luckily there are no points for attendance. And those times I did attend the class was so awful. They're very bad at English, the powerpoint is filled with spelling mistakes and they present it in such a dull fashion. I fell asleep half of the time I attended, and I wasn't the only one. They got a terrible score on that ratemyprofessor website.'

'Yeah, you always have some of those', she admitted with a laugh as she made herself comfortable on his couch.

Had she dressed in skin tight leggings and an off shoulder top to show off her figure to him, and put on red lipstick just to pull his attention towards her lips? Maybe.

His eyes raked over her.

They were both too smart not to notice the charged atmosphere, but both decided to pretend they hadn't.

'How do you study?'

'I mostly just read my notes and summaries and that's enough. But with this one?' He shoved a box her way filled with pictures of temples and artefacts. On the backside of the pictures stood names, dates and places.

'Flashcards, my, you put a lot of time and effort in this.'

'I think I need it. I still to need to get the info from the cards and into my brain.'

'No easy feat, but I'm sure you'll be able to. When's the exam?'

'In three days.'

'Oh, that's plenty of time. I always had the worst exam schedules. Sometimes I barely even had two days. Had to re-do those a lot in the second chance period', she lied with a laugh.

'Yeah no, I had enough of time for each.'

'Okay. And you've studied the entire course already?'

'Yeah, started on time for this one.'

'So all we need to do,' she said while taking a vocabulary list, 'is drill you?' She'd had gel nails ever since they came into existence because her human nails had been quite neglected. Now the shiny red ones slid over the paper in a way that Jasper couldn't call anything but erotic.

'It appears so', he said, staring down at the table filled with course material.

He looked up at her, blue eyes glimmering over the edge of his glasses.

A scare interrupted his left eyebrow, and a scar marked a path from the middle of his head to his right temple. His great hands, littered with white marks which had probably turned nearly invisible to human eyes, took another box of flash cards in his. On the front side were names of dynasties, on the back all the names of the rulers, alongside their periods.

The venom in her mouth made it hard to swallow.

'Let's get started, shall we?'

Another one of her older visions had come true.

He did a good job of staying focussed, and she had to admit he was right when he said he didn't yet control the material. The part of her that wanted to see him succeed, won from the part that lusted after him, and kept interrogating him until three in the morning.

Until he looked up at her after having spent some ten minutes studying a card, and a vision started dancing in front of her eyes.

Her collection of cards slipped from between her fingers, and tumbled to the floor. Jasper, confused at her sudden dreamy state, was with her in seconds. Her eyes glassed over.

He was next to her.

Holding her hand.

Staring at her.

They bent forward.

A kiss.

A hand forcefully pulling her towards him.

Alice splayed out naked on top of the couch.

Someone tugged at her hand, pulling her back to the present.

The vision passed, and she found herself sitting in the exact position her vision had started with.

'Are you alright?'

She nodded.

'I must be getting tired.'

'Yeah, it's gotten quite late.'

'We should rest. You need some sleep to be able to focus tomorrow.'

'Perhaps', he said as his face bent forward and nuzzled her neck.

But her visions weren't done with her.

Another came. Sudden and quick.

A single image but it was powerful enough to chase any butterflies she was feeling and replaced them with a solid brick in her belly and an ashy taste in her mouth.

Jasper.

Jasper who was sitting beside her, getting on with life so greatly, dead.

'I'm, I'm sorry. I can't.'

He drew back. The barriers coming up in front of his eyes.

She could die all over again.

It had taken him two months to reach out to her, and it had taken a whole evening before he collected the courage to approach her like that, and now that he finally dared to kiss her, she withdrew.

'It's… I can't explain. I'm sorry. It's not you. I swear.'

Though it was him. His death. Again.

She knew that if she left now, she wouldn't have to wait for another invitation.

She couldn't deal with him right now, but neither could she leave.

And so she did the only thing that could convince him of the harmlessness of her refusal.

She fell to the floor and started to sob.

His instincts took over, crawling to her and throwing his arms around her.

'I loved someone once, many years ago', she confessed.

'And you miss him still?'

She nodded.

Then realized how that message came across.

'He died.'

Jasper tensed. The struggle to live after someone had died was something he recognized. Throwing your life away was a waste, so you had to live it. But going on without them, knowing they could never experience something new, felt selfish and wrong.

He didn't know whether she talked of a lover or a friend. But it simply had to be a lover, if she suddenly started thinking about him when he was about to kiss her. Yet, years ago, she hadn't shied away from his touch. Though, she had told him she wished to forget the past the night they had sex.

Was she still in mourning? That could explain why she'd told him she was in love while she wasn't seeing anyone.

'Why think of him now?'

'These images. They pop up inside my head at the worst of times, on the exact moments I wish they would leave me alone.'

'They have a tendency to do that', he agreed.

In that instant, he saw her in a new light. The perfect untouchable Alice Cullen, who seemed to be a bottomless source of cheer, had dark depths to her.

He thought of all the times he'd cursed her last year. Damning her for seeing him so weak while she was without flaw or scar. He thought she'd guided him while she herself had never felt the agonizing pain of loss. She became real, yet all the more ethereal. He had a stony façade, but it cracked while her mind was a fortress which never showed what was within. He never could have guessed. Each day she lived, each day she helped people, moving on from whatever hurt her in a manner he would never be able to achieve.

He wondered what kind of man managed to bring forth such feelings within her. If a woman like her felt so affected by him, he could only be more amazing than she.

He hated him.

'Would you mind if I wanted to be alone? You need your sleep after all.'

He couldn't keep her. She was suffering. The least he could do was allow her privacy. He didn't have a fancy degree, had never learned how to comfort someone.

She took her coat, scarf and gloves.

'Jasper, stay safe please.'

'Of course.'

She nodded, for some reason appearing unconvinced and disappointed while her wish was so average for people taking leave, as was his answer.

'Hey Alice, you too.'

'Don't worry, I'm tougher than I look.'

* * *

Thank you to my lovely readers, and especially the commentators.

21: Thanks, I try to make it suitable and believable for a 19 and a 21 year old who've been through so much.

Girl Who Writes: Thanks, in Stephenie Meyer like words: it came to me in a dream. I'm so glad I finally found inspiration for a Jalice fic. There seems to be so little out there for those interested in J/A shippers who are interested in the "what if one of them is human" scenario :)

deltagirl74: He didn't try to kill himself. He did get drunk when he learned of his mother's death. Alice freaked out of course, thinking Jasper had fallen into the same hopeless pit as the old Jasper. As I hope became clear in the previous chapter he'd gotten into a row with one of his father's friends. They didn't take so kindly to him joining the army, what with all their illegal business and all (and the fact that there's very much a "you don't betray family" vibe in drug circuits). I glossed it over a bit because in the end, it isn't too important in my story and I do quite enjoy a quicker pace in this story. He hasn't started to wonder how Alice finds him. He's a fool, and there's a lot of coincidence in life. Her showing up in a bar near his base with a believable reason and a group of girlfriends was believable, and she already worked in the ward when he arrived so he couldn't know it was because of him (who would think someone could see the future?). This is the first time it is odd, and he was drunk. I personally believe he is too preoccupied with himself and his poor self-esteem to think much about others. Even while he's in love with Alice, he doesn't reflect a lot on how odd her behaviour is, he doesn't question her. And she never gives him the time to dwell on her more odd behaviour, she easily guides his attention elsewhere. I even have a reason for him ignoring all the bruises; he had a drill earlier on in the day and didn't pay a lot of attention to his looks. Except for the hickeys, he thought he had gotten the bruises during the daytime :)

Meagan; She did! Stay tuned for the time she'll really have to save him ;) Our baby isn't out of the woods yet

Grandy: He's gonna meet them sooner then you think :) I haven't quite figured out how I'm going to shape his relationship with them. His ancestor was supposed to arrive with Alice. He was supposed to be a part of their family, so his character is supposed to fit in, yet they've had to deal with a depressed Alice for decades. The past Jasper had a hard time because of his blood lust, but he was also the person who fixed their new passports and legal documents, who trained their army in Eclipse, who helped Alice with her visions, and calmed down the family with his gift. This Jasper hasn't proved his use yet, and won't have the same opportunities to show his merits. And Old Jasper connected with the Cullens because he experienced the 19th and 20th century as well. The most recently deceased person before Bella was Emmett. All the Cullens have experienced the same culture, were raised in strict but loving families, he doesn't have that right now, so they *could* have" a harder time connecting. Anyway, stay tuned


	15. January 2016

**January 1****st**** 2016**

'If you're afraid. Change him!' Bella sighed while holding the hand of her most beloved sister-in-law.

Edward was broodily looking at the pair from the piano.

She looked up at Edward, who had encouraged her to bite him before, but had refrained from saying anything like it since 2014.

'You should understand. You never changed Bella until you had no other choice.'

'I know. I'm conflicted Alice. I encouraged you to change him back when we thought he could die, back when you couldn't look out for him. But he's a healthy human being, living in the same city as you. I watched over Bella like a hawk before she turned. You don't need to turn him just to feel at ease. If you're afraid he's gonna die you should look over him. Unless another vampire has it out for him, there's no death you can't protect him from.'

'You'd have her waste away every minute of the day either in his presence or following his shadow, just so she can guarantee his safety?' Renesmee asked in disgust. 'That's no life dad. It's already breaking her.'

'It's breaking her because she feels powerless, while she is anything but. She simply needs to take control.'

'It won't feel like an inconvenience to her, Ness', Jacob muttered.

'It comes natural, to look out for them', Edward sighed.

'It's just a breach of privacy, showing a lack of trust. You said that telling him years ago would have made him run. Would that still be the case?' Bella asked.

'Maybe you should just let fate run its course', Emmett offered.

All eyes went to him.

'Just being the devil's advocate but… You don't want to tell him. You don't want to turn him. You don't want to lose him. He's not the previous Jasper. If this one dies, it isn't permanent. You can bring him back. Maybe it's meant to be.'

'He still has to turn twenty-two. He's so young.'

'Who says that vision takes place anywhere in the near future? It could be years still. All I'm saying is: just continue hanging out with him. You don't have to become a stalker, just stay close enough. You'll know when the time comes.'

'And live with the prospect of him possibly dying at a certain point?'

'Well, that'll be human relationships for you, auntie', Jacob huffed. 'At least you have the added benefit of seeing the future. Mortals don't have that. They will never know when the time comes.'

'It makes it easier to enjoy the present. Ignorance is bliss', Alice muttered.


	16. April 3rd 2016 7:57AM

**January 15****th****.** Jasper and Alice went for a walk and pretended everything was fine and they were just friends. Jasper thinking Alice was still in love with another man, an idea that become harder to bear each day.

February 11th. Alice went to Jasper on the anniversary of his mother's death, thinking he could use the comfort. A girl opened the door instead and she left.

February 12th. Alice finally answered a text from Jasper, saying she was busy working.

March 5th. They went out together and some drunk girl kept approaching Jasper. Edward decided she needed company.

March 14th. The Denali's and Cullens came to town. All the girls, except Alice because she had already indulged in retail therapy, went shopping. On his walk to college, Jasper once again saw her with the dandy and the bronze haired boy who had appeared in family portraits with her.

She was cheerful, something she hadn't been when they met the last two times. Why had her bubbly demeanour changed around him?

Did she trust him to stop acting cheerful around him, more than she trusted her family and this man?

Or had she finally decided his company didn't bring her as much joy? He'd never been a delight to be around. He was moody and sullen, the only good thing about him was his humour. Maybe his moods got her down.

March 28th. Alice helped Jasper read through an important paper. She mentioned her family being in town and asked him out for drinks with them.

April 2nd. The dandy had a gorgeous blonde girlfriend, and Jasper had never felt so relieved. Even when, upon meeting her family, he discovered they were all college students, smart and gorgeous, as were their partners. Alice was the only one unmarried.

'So I present to you my friend, Jasper Whitlock. Jasper, these are-'

'He looks exactly like-' The dandy was slapped by the long blonde.

Funnily enough, the dandy he had decided to dislike was the one he found himself talking most with. He heard him out on all kinds of topics, and was surprised how much Garrett loved military history as well. They shared many outlooks on life, though Garrett enjoyed being reactionary and contrary. In casual conversation almost not a single serious word left his mouth, and his eyes shone with mischief whenever he got a rise out of his girlfriend Kate.

They went out clubbing, and in a bold move he hadn't expected, he suddenly found himself kissing Alice after seeing her face crumple when everyone around her constantly kissed each other.

Maybe she didn't love him, but perhaps, his kiss could make her forget again.

Her arms held him so tightly he feared his ribs would crack. She was a lot more powerful than she let on.

She answered the kiss hungrily, completely burying herself between his arms.

He didn't understand anything.

April 3rd 1:42 AM. They stumbled through the door of Alice's apartment, divesting each other of their clothes. She was moaning, she was begging, she was pleading. He could barely comprehend half of the words she was saying, some so silent they didn't seem more than a sigh, some not making any sense at all.

He died to know what made her warm up to him tonight, but was afraid asking too many questions would remind her of how she couldn't possibly want this. So he refrained from asking. His need for her now reached a pathetic level, and it had been over a month since he had even touched another body except for tonight on the dance floor. He needed to feel her hands and lips.

He fell asleep some time afterward while laying beside her, his sweaty hand stroking her cold one. She had such poor blood circulation.

Three times they had kissed each other and they'd had sex two times, with years between those two times. A relationship had never been a realistic prospect.

They were friends, but he wondered if she wanted more. Maybe it was just a combination of him kissing her and her not wanting to be alone tonight.

They got along nicely, despite having slept and kissed before. A one night stand could be risky while sleeping with him offered her the pleasure she needed while still remaining safe.

She knew Jasper would take her back, he could never quit her. In the best case scenario, they were still friends in the morning, without any added awkwardness. That way he could keep his crush and his friend.

As long as they were friends he could fight until he was good enough for her. She had always brought out the best in him. He had no doubt he could continue to better himself, get that degree, and become truly worthy of her.

They took their leave of each other in the morning without apparent awkwardness, as Jasper needed to go to work that day, and needed to go home to change.

Alice decided that instant that she would tell him about her feelings that night. She was done with their dancing around each other.

At 7.20 AM Jasper Whitlock left Alice Cullen's apartment and set on a walk home.

At 7.34 AM, a hungry vampire in an alley caught the scent of a human man nearby. He'd only just arrived in the city with his short blonde mate, looking for fresh blood and in need of some city spirit after months spent in the mountain region.

At 7.35, Peter pulled a tall blond man into the alley and jerked away from his would-be victim when the face of his former best friend looked at him with apprehension.

'Jasper! What are you doing here?'

'Pardon me, but do I know you?'

The man with silver blond hair had a recognizable southern twang, and Jasper easily let his Southron accent slip through as well now that he was faced with someone from his birth region.

'It must've been since 1938, ever since you left Charlotte and I.'

'1938? That long ago?'

This man knew his name and was obviously from Texas as well, but Jasper couldn't remember him. And why did he mention such an early date? He left in 2003. Had he met this man as a child.

'I don't understand… You're human. Older. How?'

'Of course I'm human', Jasper said, slowly backing away.

Should he play along?

The man stepped forward, and Jasper took notice of the red eyes in the morning light. Not natural.

Was this a vampire cosplayer? High on some drugs and effectively thinking he'd been alive for over half a century?

'How is Charlotte?' He asked, deciding to play along.

'Fine, hunting somewhere. We've gotten married, decided it was worth it after all. We did drain the altar boys after', he laughed.

'I see.'

'Where have you been all this time?'

'I moved to the North around 2003', he confessed.

Peter came closer.

'Happen to be wearing contacts and a fake beard? Bathed in the blood of a human? No, your heart is beating. Who are you and what have you done with Jasper Whitlock?' he hissed.

Jasper took another step back, and stumbled over a can of tomato sauce, falling to the ground.

'I am Jasper Whitlock!'

'Liar! Where is the Jasper Whitlock who served with me in Maria's vampire army for fifty years!'

Jasper took his phone and carefully threw it towards him. The red eyed man picked it up and took Jasper's driving license.

'Born in… Are you shitting me? How? How do you have his name and his face if this is real?'

'You're from the South! I can hear it. Where were you born?'

'Texas.'

'Where?'

'Houston.'

'To whom?'

'Kendra Whitlock.'

'Your mothers surname? Why do you have your mother's surname?'

'She was raped by an unknown man.'

'Who is your grandfather?'

'John Whitlock.'

'And before that?'

'Waylon Whitlock.'

'Before?'

'I don't know.'

'Waylon you said?'

'Yeah.'

'He mentioned a living cousin named Waylon once', the man muttered.

His eyes became sharp.

'A straight up living copy. How odd. Have you never met a man who looks exactly like you, but with red eyes?'

'No.'

Jasper crawled back, slicing his hand open on a shard of broken glass.

The blond man groaned.

'Man if he lives he's going to be so pissed I attacked his cousin.'

At 7:55 AM A starving Peter started drinking from the doppelgänger of his former friend.

At 7: 57 AM on Sunday April 3rd 2016, the 22 year old Jasper Whitlock was drained of nearly all his blood. Peter The Nomad was pulled away from the body by his mate Charlotte, who thought he was attacking their former friend.

Afraid and horrified by his actions, the two nomads left the alley, leaving Jasper Whitlock to bleed out.

* * *

Exciting, isn't it?

It seems everyone is on edge about how he'll react to finding out about Major Jasper... Guess we'll find out soon, won't we?


	17. April 7th 2016

**April 3****rd**** 2016**

7.34 AM. Alice Cullen let herself plop down on her black leather, wrapped in her bedsheets. They smelled of him. She let out a happy sigh at the prospect of meeting him tonight. She finally felt ready. Tonight she would tell him she loved him, and she was pretty sure he loved her.

He'd quit the military over a year ago. He'd had enough chances to meet other women. He'd tried seeing other women but he'd kept drifting towards her just like she kept coming back to him. She wondered if the Old Jasper would have drawn her to him if there would have been episodes of anguish and insecurity like there were this time. She couldn't imagine seeing a different man and wanting him more each time she saw him despite all the trouble.

She knew that technically, she hadn't had a relationship with either of them, but this was the Jasper she knew. The Jasper she'd connected with. She had a real chance at a future with him. She hadn't quite figured out how she'd tell him about the vampire-thing, and she still wasn't sure whether she wanted to pull him away from the human life he was building, but she was certain that it would go well today. They'd figure it out together.

At 7: 55 AM Alice Cullen was pulled away from her thoughts by a vision of Peter deciding to drink from Jasper.

Alice was too stunned too react for six awfully long seconds in which the band-aid was ripped right off of the wound of her memory of the old Jasper dying.

It was happening again.

But then, a stronger feeling of determination blossomed. She wasn't going to lose him this time.

As she ran out of her apartment she called Edward, Bella, Rosalie, Emmett and Carlisle. Everyone was prepared to do what was necessary. Carlisle had immediately packed all supplies and moved towards their house in that state. They should be there in forty minutes.

Jasper's scent was fresh on Alice's skin and last night's clothes.

He hadn't gotten far, only two blocks away from her. His lips were pail and his neck wrecked.

Emmett had said no human action could kill him. Well, it hadn't been a human. He'd been drained of a crucial amount of blood by a rogue vampire. She had to get him out of the city as soon as possible.

Running through the streets wouldn't be subtle so she jumped on top of the building. She'd go from roof to roof until she'd reached the border. She was joined by her adoptive siblings quite quickly.

'How is he?'

'I don't know. I haven't taken the time to observe him alright? I'm focussed on getting him away from the city right now.'

'Can you guess how well he is?'

'I never studied medicine Edward.'

'What if we would stop right now. What would happen?'

Alice considered going to a mortal hospital instead. It immediately evoked a vision.

Death.

'He'll die. They can't fix this.'

'Can Carlisle? There'd be no waiting time. Perhaps with a lot of blood transfusions and immediate care there is a chance he'd – ?'

'I don't think there is, Ed.'

They reached the edge of the city and started running in earnest.

Jasper let out a feeble moan, his eyes shut.

'Jasper, love, hold on please. Hold on for me. We're going to help you.'

'Tired.'

'No, no wait. Just wait. You'll never be tired again I promise you. Just wait and hang on. Look at me… Look at me please. Please, Jasper? Yes. Like that. Look at me. Stay awake. You've lost a lot of blood. Its dangerous if you lose conscience.'

They got to the house in the hills an hour after the attack had happened. Jasper's eyes hadn't managed to stay open for more than two minutes and his pulse was growing weaker each second.

Carlisle was already present and lead them immediately into the room he and Esme had prepared. Alice gently laid him down.

'Jasper? Jasper? You're going to die unless we help you. But if we help you, you'll have to live forever. You'll have to drink blood. You won't be able to live a normal life anymore. Are you sure you want that?'

'Hmpf.'

'Jasper? Do you understand?'

'How… Bout you? Are you?'

'Yes. I live forever. That's why I have those two degrees while still looking young.'

'Knew… Suspicious. Yes.'

'You agree?'

'Donnn… Wanna… Die.'

Alice nodded.

'Okay. We'll help you. I'll be right here when you wake up.'

Carlisle stepped forward but Alice stopped him.

'I want to do it.'

'Are you sure?'

'Help me.'

She finally took the time to properly look at him. Pale, damaged, scarred. His heartbeat was weak and his beautiful eyes were closed. They would never have their original beautiful colour again.

Would he struggle as much with his bloodlust as the old Jasper?

Did it matter? No, she would turn him anyway.

She took his pulse. She was sure her own heart would beat like crazy if she had a heartbeat. She bit down hard and long, allowing her venom to seep in. Carlisle mimicked her action on his other pulse. She moved towards his neck and bit down again in the undamaged part. The other part reeked of the venom of a stranger.

Afterwards Carlisle and her each bit an ankle.

His heartbeat picked up immediately.

'Right well, Alice, I'm going. I don't want to be in his head right now.'

'I understand, thank you Eddie.'

'We'll be leaving as well, alright Alice?' Kate asked softly.

'Yes. You needn't stay. It was very kind of you to accompany us.'

'Call us, we'll be looking forward to seeing you again once he's settled.'

'I will.'

Rosalie and Emmett also took their leave. Now it was only her, Carlisle and Esme. All the others would be back by the third day, she knew.

'Want to clean him up a little?' Esme offered.

Alice nodded and took the wet washing cloth.

'Need some privacy?'

'Yes. Could you get me a pair of trousers from Emmett and a shirt from Carlisle? He's kind of in between their sizes.'

'His shoulders are a lot broader than those of Carlisle, dear. Maybe a shirt won't fit be the best idea. How about a t-shirt and a sweater?'

'Yeah', she couldn't stop the smile pulling at her lips. She'd spent a long time admiring those shoulders, strong and muscular from time in the military and construction.

'I'll go and see', Esme announced and closed the door with a decisive thud.

It had been an hour since her vision, and a little over an hour since he left her apartment with a bright but insecure smile on his face. Their dining room table was positively huge but his legs still draped over the edges. She was glad it wasn't a glass table like in Forks. That one would have shattered the second he started trashing. So tall, and she was so small.

It felt like sacrilege to step closer to someone battling death.

His pants were dirty, his dark blue shirt blood stained. His neck was a carnage.

She took a step closer. She could still smell him. The delightful mix of sweat, perfume and human blood.

'I'm so sorry this happened, Jasper.'

She took a seat beside him.

Throwing one last glance at his body, she started removing the signs of his bout of bad luck as a human.

'I wish I could have seen this coming. I think I did, a couple of months ago… But I didn't know when or where it would happen. If only I had paid more attention or focussed more. Perhaps I should have done as Edward said and followed you day and night to ensure your safety… But I didn't want to infringe on your privacy. Whoever killed you decided to do so in a very rash last minute decision. I didn't got a clear vision of it until it happened, and I only saw you dead once before. It was… It might as well not have happened. Yet it did and now you're losing your life because of it. If I ever find that man, I'll kill him myself. I wish I'd gotten a clear visual of his head.'

She took off his shirt. His torso was littered in scars and a black tattoo peeked at her from his side. All signs of human life would soon disappear from his body forever. She knew he hated them. He considered them "Signs of failure". But he'd lived through them all and survived. Life had never dealt him an easy hand.

She kissed the long scar on his belly, the tattoo on his side and the smaller scars on the top of his chest. She brushed her fingers through the golden hair dusted over his chest as she laid her cheek over his heart. It was beating ferociously.

'I know you can't hear me, and that this probably feels like absolute agony. But I wish you could know that I'm here for you. I'm not going to leave you. If only you knew how much I cared. I was going to tell you tonight… I was just dreaming about it when I saw that you were being killed…. Oh I wish I could cry!'

She pressed her lips on his chest and trailed them down until the edge of his jeans. She removed them and traced kisses along his leg, finally stopping at the edge of his underwear. The smell of his blood had always been strong. It probably had to do with her attraction for him. It wasn't hard to want his blood since she longed for him already. She'd never tasted any human blood before. Maybe, as he was dying, it wouldn't really hurt to take one little sip as she bit him another time? After all, it would only quicken the transformation. She pressed her lips down against his artery once more, before letting her teeth sank in. As her venom seeped from her mouth into his skin, delicious thin blood welled up against her lips and caught on her tongue. She twisted her tongue once across his wound.

'Oh.'

She closed her eyes. Overwhelmed by the taste and feel. Her mouth was on fire. The venom in her veins was burning with desire. A part of her longed to rip him open, the darkest part of her which she had always managed to surpress. And another part of her wished to make love with him right now on this very table. An even shadier part of her wanted to combine the two.

A hiss left his lips.

She was at his chest in a heartbeat, stroking his hair and holding his hand.

'I'm sorry. It's going to become even harder. Hold on.'

With her free hand she gentle swept over the wound at his neck to remove all the remaining blood.

Sitting beside him it all came tumbling out. All her fears, all her hopes and everything she wished for him stumbled out.

The tattoo on his side was fading ever so slowly, as were his scars.

And then the trashing began.

It was accompanied by inhuman screams of anguish and pain. He was too tall and strong for Esme and Alice, So Carlisle and Emmett came to keep him down for the most part.

Alice never left the room though she couldn't attribute anything of value. The second his trashing began, so did her visions.

In some visions they were happy: going to school together like in one of her earliest visions, walking through the park, strolling through a forest, kissing. Yet, she also saw fights, crying, slips of control and – she saw him finding out about the other Jasper. In every vision she received he was incredibly mad. He felt like a replacement, questioned his identity, questioned Alice's feelings for him.

Either way she would have to try her very best to hide everything that had to do with the old Jasper from him, or she would have to be very careful in the way she explained it to him. She didn't want him to feel any jealousy for a man she'd never even met.

At the end of the third day the screaming and moving stopped. Alice and Esme dressed him in the clothes Esme had picked out for him. They didn't suit him. But neither had the outfits he'd picked for himself in the past. She couldn't wait to start influencing his wardrobe. The fashion at the beginning of the decade had been a disappointing mess but she quite liked where the fashion was heading.

His sweet tender human heart was nearing the end of its fight.

Edward returned, wary of the thoughts he'd hear.

Alice intensely longed for his gift at the moment. What was Jasper thinking? Was he in pain? Had he heard anything during his transformation? Bella had. Bella had even managed to think and stay controlled during her transformation. But then she had always been an anomaly.

'He's thinking about what you said to him the day of the attack. He's annoyed he can't move or see', Edward whispered.

She tightened her grip around Jasper's hand.

'Stay strong. It isn't long now. You'll pull through.'

'He's quite certain he's died and imagined everything from the second you two kissed.'

'Wouldn't put it past him to think that.'

'He's going to be a handful. He's tall, strong and emotional. Means he'll be hard to control and prone to outbursts.'

'You don't know which traits will be the most amplified. He's older than us, just a year younger than Carlisle and he's been through a lot. It could make him tougher.'

'Could you leave the room please?' Edward asked. Alice nodded and left as Esme took her place.

'Listen,' Edward said as they left the house so that the new vampire wouldn't overhear, 'I was all for you transforming him. I understand they're not the same person but they look the same and they have the same natural interests. They're probably quite different because of their youth and life experience. The last one had some hundred years of trauma to sort through and a lifetime of being used to drinking blood. That would have made it harder for him to adopt our kind of living. But if the new one happens to have the same gift he'll have a tough time still. Can we deal with a wild untrained empath? The old one was used to his gift.'

'I know. I've thought about it. I don't know Edward. We can't go back. He's mine. No matter what happens. We can be aware of the problems and try to avoid trouble as much as we can, but he's staying and that'll entail the typical newborn problems and some problems we can't predict yet.'

'Alice! Edward! It's happening!'

Alice shot away without even looking at Edward.

When he woke up, Jasper Whitlock would be dead, and an eternal Jasper would take his place. His days in the sun, as one of the people, would come to an end.

Once he opened his eyes, he'd be nearly indestructible.

Everyone had gathered in the room. They were all dressed in practical clothing, nothing too pretty. Except Alice, who was still in her shiny black dress.

His heartbeat was so fast a heart monitor wouldn't have been able to keep up with it.

It was happening.

She took a step forward.

His heart stopped.

The silence in the room was deafening.

April 7th 2016, Jasper Hale finally died.

Despite all versions of the future she had seen, she couldn't help but be nervous. It would never play out like it had in her visions.

A breath.

A hesitant movement in his fingers.

He was awake.


	18. April 7th 2016 around noon

The sound of Her talking had been the only thing distracting him from the pain his body was in.

He recognized the voice. It was the same one he'd been hearing over and over again since before this torture began. Always gentle, always loving.

He could link it to a face too, though it was blurry. A face with golden eyes framed by black hair. He could remember them together. But something was wrong, there were feelings of pain and rejection. Despite those feelings he couldn't refrain from feeling a primitive desire for her. He needed her.

Memories floated in and out of his conscience during moments of clarity. Memories of being unhappy, memories of his mother's grave, memories of war, memories of therapy. All these feelings of being powerless annoyed him. They fuelled the angry beast inside of him.

He didn't remember himself to be as a weak man. And he didn't feel weak, even as he was in agony.

He remembered getting out of every situation he disliked. He remembered pursuing his goals without giving up. He remembered excelling in whatever he did. He was a chaser, and he always got what he wanted in the end.

And She, she had something to do with it. He didn't know whether she'd helped him with getting away from his misery, or whether she was a thing he was chasing.

After years in purgatory, his smell finally returned to him. Wood and moss. Cleaning product. Dirt. She, and Others.

Then his taste came back. His mouth was as dry as a dessert. He _needed_ something. Desperately.

He _had_ to get it.

He tried to move his hand towards his face to try and get the sand out of his mouth. A finger budged.

He could move! His eyes flew open as soon as he realized this.

Seven people stood against a wall.

_Threats_.

No, not threats.

He recognized all of them.

Except for the couple who appeared to be in their mid-twenties.

He became aware that was currently in a sitting position against a wall. He came to a stance again.

She had moved towards him, and now stood in the middle of the room.

Alice.

The pixie goddess descended from the heavens.

'Jasper, how are you feeling?'

His hand instinctively went towards the only part of his body which was still in pain; his throat.

'I understand. Do you know my name?'

'Alice.'

Her eyes lit up as she took a step towards him. He took a step forward as well, the rest of the room moved. All figures tensed up.

A threat?

Where?

He crouched again.

'Do you… Remember what happened?'

What happened?

Memories of sex with Alice came to mind.

_Again. Take her. _His brain said.

That didn't explain how he came to be in a room with seven others.

He remembered walking. He remembered being attacked.

The memories were blurry. He couldn't remember the face or the words his attacker used.

He could only remember the crippling fear as he tried and failed to get away.

'I got attacked.'

'Yes.'

She took his hand, and brought it to his chest.

'What do you hear?'

He didn't understand. Should he hear something?

She guided his hand towards her chest, right on top of her bosom.

'What do you feel?'

Nothing.

No heartbeat.

Dead. Yet she stood there.

She took his free hand and placed it onto his chest.

Knowledge which suddenly seemed so basic came flooding back. Heartbeats, breathing, blinking, bleeding. His mind was running a hundred miles an hour, but he couldn't keep up. The thoughts rushed by and only the most important thought, of the hundred thoughts and sensations, stuck with him.

Not human.

'What happened?'

'You died. Because of the attack.'

He was pretty sure it had to mean something, but his brain was too busy processing the colours in the room, the scents in the air, and his feelings for her.

It all seemed trivial.

'You were transformed into a vampire. The burning you feel in your throat right now, is thirst. You need to feed.'

He needed _blood_, he realized.

'I'm sorry I couldn't save you in a normal way.'

_'__But I didn't know when or where it would happen. If only I had paid more attention or focussed more. Perhaps I should have done as Edward said and followed you day and night to ensure your safety… But I didn't want to infringe on your privacy. Whoever killed you decided to do so in a very rash last minute decision. I didn't get a clear vision of it until it happened, and I only saw you dead once before. It was… It might as well not have happened. Yet it did and now you're losing your life because of it. If I ever find that man, I'll kill him myself. I wish I'd gotten a clear visual of his head.'_

Her voice was less clear in his memory.

'You didn't know. And you respected my privacy too much to guard me.'

'You remember.' Her eyes sparkled with a mix of pain and relief. He could kiss her right now. His body begged for it.

He suddenly remembered being human. And knew it was different to what he was now. He remembered going to school. He remembered wanting to have a good life in which she could fit. That had been his goal.

But if she was immortal, that meant that while he was human, she was not.

'You saved my life.'

'Well, technically Carlisle did, but we took it. Now you won't be able to finish your degree. Or do anything much the next few years. You'll have to be kept away from society to adjust.'

No, his dreams. His goals. His chase.

'Why?'

'It's not safe for the humans, you won't be able to control yourself.'

But then what was he to do?

'You can stay with us', another voice answered.

He turned towards the bronze haired boy.

'We're used to taking care of new vampires.'

No, it was his goal. He wanted to do it. Alice was way too competent and rich. He didn't want to be the inferior party. He needed to be worthy of her.

'Well, you'll have to learn to control your bloodlust, but from then onwards you'll be free. Until then we'll support you and make sure no harm comes to the humans.'

'You read minds.'

'I do.'

'Keep out.'

The boy's eyebrows rose to a comical height.

'I'm locked out. I can't hear him anymore.'

'Interesting', the blond man whispered.

'Alright, let's just focus on the feeding for now. I'm sorry you have to go through this Jasper. I'm sure it's all very confusing right now.'

'We'll all go together. But Alice, maybe you could stay behind so you can freshen up? You haven't left his side in three days.'

Jasper's eyes immediately shot to the short raven haired girl. She smiled and lifted her shoulders. 'Had to make sure you were fine', she said. Just like that, like caring for him was a normal thing to do.

His memories were muddled in a way he didn't understand, but as far as he _could_ remember there weren't many people that cared for him, if there were any at all. His new vampire brain had quite forgotten all the friendships he'd built up and lost during his time in the army and the few he'd had in high school.

'Do you want me to come, Jasper?'

Edward stared her down. The amount of time he had been able to look into Jasper's mind had been enough to inform him that the man was way too much in love with Alice, and very much overwhelmed by his vampiric nature. Bringing Alice along for the hunt would distract him. Bloodlust and romantic lust could provoke each other. All the couples in the family had their fair share of experiences in that area. But for a first time hunter, who had no control over his bloodlust, it was a dangerous thing. He could jump Alice in front of the family or he could be too distracted to keep himself from going after the scent of a human. The last one could and would still happen, but the chances were less likely if he was focussed.

But at least the man didn't appear to be an empath. Nobody had experienced feelings like uncontrolled hunger or confusion since he woke up. At least the panic and pain of the animals he attacked wouldn't intensify any possible guilt he might have for murdering animals.

And the hunger and negative feelings of others in the house wouldn't weigh him down either, which was a good thing since he already had so much to deal with as a newborn with a pretty shitty previous life.

It intrigued Edward that the new vampire had managed to lock him out of his head. Not many vampires had that ability. Perhaps the hunt would be the ideal moment to analyse Jasper and discover any other talents.

'You can stay, rest.'

'I don't need rest, we can't sleep.'

'Why?'

'I don't know, guess we don't need it.'

'Yet half of you have dark circles underneath your eyes.'

'That's when we're hungry. Carlisle has a lot of interesting ideas on why that is, you should hear him out sometime, if you're interested', Alice replied as she pointed towards the blond haired man.

Jasper nodded and looked toward Alice again.

'But you can rest without sleeping?'

'Yes, I can indeed', she admitted with a smile.


End file.
